163. One Question That Will Significantly Help You Make Better Decisions

We always need to make decisions. Some are small, but some are big. But there comes a time when we have to make a critical decision on things we have little knowledge about. (Date, spouse, finance, and God) Some pretend to know everything about it and make a decision. But they usually regret it at the end. The best thing to do in such a situation is this: Ask someone who knows better and knows you better, “What do you think is the wisest thing for me to do?”. (Proverbs 1:5)

We often hate people giving their opinions on our private decisions. We think, “This is my life, so they should just mind their own business!”. However, here is the truth. First, whether you like it or not, people around you already have an opinion about your decision. You probably also have one about the decision your friends or neighbours recently made: about the car they bought or the girlfriend/boyfriend they chose.

Second, our private decisions have public consequences. If you think about it, choosing who you marry might be the most private decision, but it impacts more people publicly than any other decision. So it is much better to listen to their opinions before, not “after” your decision if you are going to hear from them anyway. You might not like what they say, but simply by listening, you will position yourself for a much better decision making.

One of the best decisions I’ve made is asking people whom I trusted before deciding to become a pastor. I was sure in my heart that God called me into full-time church ministry, but I chose to ask 4-5 people who knew me well, “What do you think I should do?” Not only they supported my decision, which gave me confidence; they also brought valuable insight about myself that I didn’t know before. They told me why I should pursue this path based on their knowledge of me, which still encourages me now.

One of the worst things you can do to yourself and to people you love is making decisions by yourself. Why not start asking people you trust or have authority over you, “what do you think is the wisest thing for me to do?” It can prevent major relational and moral failures and costly mistakes that might hunt you for the rest of your life.